The empowered do not fucking whisper. Whispers are for secrets and sins. And, anyway, the empowered are not afraid to exclaim either. So what was that I witnessed yesterday? I would call it walking on eggsells. Somehow it doesn’t fit.
I have always hated silence. Silence in schools, and in church, silence in tense and troubled conversations, silence in early day when even the sun screams mute it's ice blue tones, silence in regret. I always hated silence, but I hate whispers more.
Yesterday I sat with you on the stoop at midnight. The words were mostly the same, they’ve been the same all my life, but misery loves company and I’m vacant enough to be it’s vessel. We sat in that same old dead conversation, but this time something changed.
This time, you said, it was real. This time the words weren’t empty. This time you felt it and meant it, you said, because this time you had finally spoken it aloud, finally told him what you thought; that you couldn’t grow old like that. You couldn’t live to die.
I sat with you on the cold concrete and your hands were nervous and you filled your beer again, and whispered to me in a heavy lipped mess that you were finally happy. But people do not whisper when they are free, and tomorrow you will lay with him again.
I’m sorry I grew angry with you. I shouldn’t have yelled. You’re not ready for loudness. Maybe some day you’ll realize you’ve built your own cage. Maybe some day I’ll be able to forgive you, and realize I’ve built mine.
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2 comments:
I can't figure out how to post it, 'sky, however...here's the link:
The only cage you need
...is an open one! :)
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